This happened two years ago in April 2014, so perhaps this post is way overdue but it is one of my most memorable encounter with God so I would like to write about it.
Back then my sister and I, together with a fellow pilgrim, Peter, met up in Rome to attend the canonization of the two Pope, Pope John XXIII and Pope John Paul II, (but that is a story for another day) we then went on a 7-hour night train journey to San Giovanni Rotondo in Foggia to visit Padre Pio.
We got off the train station in Foggia very early in the morning and had a shot of espresso (when you're in Italy and you're a coffee lover like me, you would know what a blessing this is) while waiting for the bus that would take us to San Giovanni. After an hour or so of traveling by bus, we reached our destination. We got off the bus and had to somehow figure out where our respective accommodations are through a city map we found at the park opposite the bus stop. Along the way, we met this little dog who followed us and much to our amusement acted as our guide to the Santuario Santa Maria delle Grazie - Padre Pio's Church. As it was early morning, we decided to head to our respective accommodation, ours was a nearby hotel from the church while Peter's hostel was one that we have passed along the way from the bus stop to the church, and meet up after we have freshened up.
(At this point, I must say that before this trip and prior to our visit to San Giovanni that I have not been to confession and have not been receiving communion for a few weeks - even the time when we were in Rome. And as one would be after being away from God for a long time, I was desperate to come back, reconcile, and be with him again.)
Having dropped our luggage and freshening up a bit we all met up back in the church, we explored a bit and looked at the schedule for services, taking note of confession times. We then went to Mass and I made the usual arms crossed over my chest to ask for a blessing from the priest during communion, as I have not been to confession yet, but the priest - maybe not recognising the gesture as it is back home - gave me the host. Thinking back at that time, I was surprised that he was giving it to me that I somehow reflexively said Amen and took it. Thankfully, we were able to go to confession right after. And it was that confession that made this whole trip to this place so special because it was there that I experienced God's great mercy and love.
The confessionals were located at the side of a church, it was a rectangular room that had a cross in the middle, pews either side of it and small confessional rooms surrounding it. Before the confession, I remember feeling very nervous and praying desperately for help and guidance. And as the queue got shorter and my turn got nearer the more nervous I got and finally it was my turn. I remember looking down at first during my confession and slowly lifting my head up and looking straight in the eyes of the priest. No matter what I felt during that time, even if I was so ashamed of what I was confessing, I was not able to look away from his eyes till the end. I couldn't help it and I probably would not have been able to take my eyes away even if I wanted to because in his eyes I saw no judgement, only love, and it gave me courage to keep going. Afterwards, I just felt so light, thankful, overwhelmed and loved that all I could do was look at the cross from the pews and cry. It was a very emotional and humbling experience and one that I will probably always remember.
When everyone finished their confession, the three of us went to La Via Crusis to do the stations of the cross, went on the tour around the old church wherein we saw Padre Pio's cell, the crucifix from which he received the stigmata, and stuff he owned from clothes to rosaries; afterwards, we went to the new church at the back and to the tomb where Padre Pio lay. On the way to the tomb are these beautiful mosaics about the life of St. Francis and Padre Pio opposite each other and the walk to the tomb was a nice way to meditate, pray and ponder about the life of these two inspiring saints.
"When you go to Confession... the misery of the soul meets the God of Mercy."
-Jesus
